Secrets Of Me

Whatttt??? That's the only words i can said + a confused look like this poor kitten here ->->->-> ->->-> when ALMOST ALL my friends married or getting married give the same comments about my new kinky stuff : " I'm so shy! I dont want to wear it " " Oh it's too sexy why should i wear it, i'm so shy " " What for i wear it? I rather naked then wearing those " " I don't need that, naked is better n enough " " It's see through, makes me shy, i dont want to wear it " " I don't like it, it's not my custom " Please help me i dont understand why?? why??? I'm too culture shock here! especially from those married people who said they are too shy to wear it. I don't believe it!!! Exception for single ladies la... but still! It's confusing! First: It's not too sexy! It's just see through, nice n nice n nice not that daring and kinky at all (for the first 3 items)

At last!! Me & Syareena has launched our new baby called Kinky lingerie! This is my dream comes true. I have been dreaming to have this kinky line (though i'm not designing it :P) since i was in high school. Supposing i myself wanna produced my own design.. but none of us know sewing hehehe. Perhaps in future we manage to produce our own design.. who knows. So.. Get ready to spike the hotness level yáll... http://kinkysweetnaughty.blogspot.com/

*yawn* I am so sleepy... this few days has been a very slow days for me, kind of blur. My excitement learning java and focus in my works n searching for house somehow is decreasing due to the reality that i am still stuck in this company doing things i dislike + the java thing hmm... got stuck somewhere and get bored + the house thingy hmm... stuck as well with some title issues, it will take at least 4 month to settle everything before we can sell it plus we havent find the perfect new house + i missed my fluffy. During my study years, i have a habit to wandering around shopping mall or park or just walking anywhere alone & spend my time thinking. It's something i will do normally when i'm depressed or sad or need some space to be alone. It's where i feel that i have all the freedom i want and will feel happy doing it. It makes me wondering about things past, future and presents. People or object that surronds me, and even predict what other peoples life could be by ju

I'm pretty bz this week doing things that perhaps will unleash my real inner business capabilities hahaha (as if). I've long stop making money with my own business since high school. What a waste, i don't know why i stop it when i went to University... I did remember when i was in primary school, my best friend n my best business buddy, Jasmin. Both of us love money and we love selling anything that can bring profits to us. We have kind of good business. U know, kids those days love to waste money for unreasonable thing n both of us have the supply of unreasonable thing. That makes our business so good. :P That's 1 of main tips u can use in business "customers loves unreasonable, money wasted, unvaluable, cheap, shiny, cute, and again cheap thing". This kind of people really don't care to waste their money to people like me hehehe. The most unreasonable thing to buy those days is : a cute small butterflies in a box . Who ever start the idea is realy the b

Eeerrrrrrrr.... My brain is being actively active suddenly. As usual thinking about money haha n how to get more money hahhaa. I know i have lots of ideas but never was implement, cause some r ridiculous n some r too nonsense, above all, all needs hardwork n focus n determination which i'm lack off.. i know i'm lazy bum. Impressively! Unexpectedly! Surprisingly! I start learning Java since last friday n now im in chapter 3! This is my first time being focus since my Uni time. There must be some shot wire in my head hehe. We'll see how long i can focus on Java. :P Another headache is the house thingy.. i had a buyer today who interested to buy my house n hoping i will cut RM40k from the price i put, definitely i wont agree on that cause i want to buy a RM270k house. So whatever it is we need to sell it around that price la. If we succeed .... *sigh* I guess this what's inside my head now n forever heheheh;

That's why i'm getting fat It will never be enough... Do u believe it? believe it. It's totally true and i can't lie about it. I am not so satisfied of what i have especially the job, the salary n the life i have now. Though it's not that bad neither it's so good... i felt totally depressed n dissapointed cause i can't buy the house i want!!! I want that Alam budiman house for myself or that huge parkland house. :( Will rm4k be enough? i dont think so.... will rm8k be enough? i dont think so cause by that time i surely wanna buy a big bungalow! So, how to feel enough? Not that i'm not thankful, i am. It's just that "if" i have this n that..."if" i can buy this n that... it's all about the IF words. Agree? or not agree? *sigh* Somebody told me "can u please not complaining for once?". It's not wrong to complain as long as it's not over the limit, but to some people talking is consider complaining. Amazing isn

I'm back n without much excitement from Penang that i can share here... I can say it's a plain trip, nothing is memorable there except that we have fun hang out on the beach n i build stones scuplture! i can susun 3 stones only la... it's not that easy too la... still i'm proud i can do it la. I tried with big stones too n successful! Look at the creation of zilan's stones sculpture below, though not as good as this Bill Dan guy - he's a proffesional, who travel around the world n earn his living just by balancing stones. Some people... their life sounds so easy right? WHY?!?! :p Well in short what we did in Penang are : First day: check in -> lunch at town -> hang out at swimming pool -> beach -> sculpture-> watch my collegue fishing -> dinner at the ship (dissapointed -it's expensive, nothing special infact we can eat it here in KL actually. we should just venture around the Feringghi to find place to eat, i saw a lot more interesting re

Ladies and gentlemen, i would like to announce here that eventually my doomsday is my finest day of presentation ever. It's smooth n so natural. Surprisingly I done it without feeling nervous n trembling n sweating... instead i feel excited and happy with the presentation. Hehehe.. weird but fun! Now... the sounds of wave is just a few miles away!! I'm going for a short 2 days trip to penang... yippie! another vacation for me this year... perhaps the last one :P I'll be back with more stories!!

Time is ticking, i've been sleeping, need some aspirin, need more aspirin! Time is chasing me, nervous is within me, i need some indome, to feed stomach of me. Time is passing by, what a lullaby, i should instead go n buy, burger from that Bai! half more days before the doomsday, I'm still babling on this mid day, useless to say, i need a burger today! This poem is the results, of the activations of my nervous system, it's tickling, mingling, diggling, n ling ling, releasing gasses, creating butterflies flyings happily in the trapped of gasses, up n down making me restless, what if i release big gigantic gasses, on the stage n being heard by 170 peoples??? Oh no... no.. no!! It wont happen cause the microphone is on the desk, perhaps i can make a loud "Achooo", to cover the gasses bombastic explosions, Thus the history is covered, But people next to me will fainted. Oh shit, my burger! i need it now! it's 1 pm, i need it now! Oh shit, i wasted my precious time

Want to know how i feel now??? this is how i feel: HAIR WIRED Uhuks.. 2 more days to go for the damned Roll out! WHY! WHY! WHY! why i'm still working in this company when everything that i hate to do-training, demo, presentation-are my main job here! Uhuks.. 170 people has confirmed to come, which means i have to present in front of 170 people. Shit, even though i have done many demos (not so many actually), still a lot of butterflies not only in my stomach but all over my body ... uhuks. SCARED!

*sigh* tired just got back from office. *sigh* what i wanna write?... *sigh* K.. i tried to write something about raya b4 but don't have any idea what to write and not available almost everyday. It's been kind of empty raya.. not as i expected due to the kenduri at Perak. It's such a waste of time cause we can't go beraya to alot of houses like we always did. Only 2 house we visited!! :( First day : My collegues came and even my big boss daniel came with his son! He seems enjoy eating all the food hehe. Meet nurul friends from China - Jack. He eats a lot! i enjoy seeing him eating afterall. Perak: 3D 2N at K.Mas house. I dont help much as usual, It's only us, her siblings and her auntie stayed there for 2 night. The rest of her family came after the wedding, jeez.. we r so nice that we stay there for 2 night!! We went to Hot spring park again - not so enjoying, the hot spring is too hot. I stay in for 15 mnts and already felt nausea and wanna faint. All of us cannot

Leo,i'm sorry if i treat u bad or i didn't take a good care of u. Not much i can do to help u healed, I tried my best... I'm gonna missed u so much. I love u Leo.

Selamat Hari Raya!!! Well, i don't think i ever felt so excited about raya since im in high school! i feel so fun fun fun. I wanna eat rendang, lemang, nasi impit n pineaple tarts - my favourites. Perhaps what makes me more excited then before is because I have a new purple room, a nice black n white baju raya, new mascara, new foundation, new brooch and a new fury aka bulu bulu hand beg (mcm bdk kecik dpt benda br) and of course.. a long holidays, from tuesday to next wednesday. This year will be a bit different, as we going to Perak n stay at my sis in law's house for 2 nights, which i don't like it at all, i had too, though it's nice to go to the hot spring park, i just don't like to stay at other people's house. Feel uncomfortable. What çhoice i have, im the only driver here. :( Good news is we're going to have an open house on 12/10. Menu hven't decide yet but the best part is, maybe we will served satay on that day... it has been years we don'

Ahh.. stretching my body for 30 times and yet i can't stop from chating, surfing and downloading musics using my new broadband. At last i manage to subscribe it :p. It seems there are people actually waiting for my story hahaha.. well maybe she's the only person also. Very well then.. since im so tired n need to sleep, i will list down what had happened since my las post :- 1.TNB tender done and using my pleasure time to relax as much as i can in the office. 2.Got my big bonus and spend it for brand new desktop and clear my credit cards.It's a big sum of money and yet i can't manage to do any shopping :(. Well at least i clear all my credit cards!!! 3.Treat my friends at Bagan Lalang. It's a good short trip!! we enjoy it so much, playing bubbles and making spastic videos on the beach. fun fun fun. basically rafiee is the only spastic one hahha.. :p 4.I lost my precious necklace :( 5.Birthday bash for Rafiee at Redbox. It's crazily fun, we laugh, dance and sing a

Why la weh we have 1 stupidos, lazy, emotional, unprofessional team member in my company??? He's keep talking about "team work", professinalism but yet, he's the only 1 who doesnt have all that criterias. Why??? because : 1.He'll give 1001s of excuses not to do any write up (maybe he's allergic to keyboard) even though its only 2-3 sentences!!! 2.He'll give MOST of his works to he's "team member" in his own definition of "team work" he always talked about. (in fact i dont see he's doing anything except talking) 3.He'll like to waste everyones time: a.call everyone for useless discussions (mainly to make him understand what is going on in the office which will take almost 1 hour to make him understand simple damn thing!!!) even though we just had the meeting yesterday. Amazingly he's the only 1 who dont understand - that's where "the eye, the hand, the ear" is needed for him. DUHH! b.He talks about no

Last week was the week of enjoyment for me! I have so much fun going to Singapore and then straight to Redang Island. I went to Singapore for the ArcLogistic training. Kind of scary at first cause its my first time going abroad and i'm all alone. I have no problem getting to Singapore -thank God-, their taxi is so expensive, the halal food is so hard to find, not many Malays can be seen, so safe, so clean, the road is wide, taxi so canggih, MRT ticket also canggih, people is friendly, barang is so murah (dont kira the xchange ratela), not as busy as KL, overall Singapore is good. :P My training is fine, a few of ESRI distributor joined the training - Australia, Singapore, Japan, China, Sri Lanka and Thailand. All of them r already expert in logistic, far more advance then ESRI Malaysia n Singapore, kind of malu also hehehe.. they all into development unlike ESRI Malaysia. The training makes me want to open my own company,to develop as well as sell the logistic software n services

Thinking about nothing is the hardest thing to do.. how can we not think about anything at all? especially for me.. thinking about many things at 1 time is normal to me. Histories, memories, life, family, friends, future, problems... all at 1 time. Lately, histories has faded and memories is blossom. Memories, its so sweet to remember but how can i cope with it any longer? It is a question, how can i cope with it? There's 2 thing i like to think of right now.. but still its just a dreams of dream. Both makes me happy in their own way :)

he's sooo my taste hehe.. Hahhaa.. it was victory for my David Cook!! I'm so happy!! hehe.. yeah he deserved to win. Even though his final night is just ok to me.. but he's a terrific performer! My most favourite songs by David Cook :- Billy Jane!

Ok.. i know people had enough of me talking n comparing Ben with all guys.. but sorry i just can't put him aside easily since he was part of my life before.. it's like natural for me to compare with him cause he has what i want in a guy, and he is so 'embedded' in my brain n my heart. I'll try not too.. i will, in the future cause i dont think he has any place in my heart anymore. He's dead to me. I won't forgive him n wont accept him back if it happens he returned. I had enough of him. Its just full of pain. No more nice girl. Ok.. i guess from now on i'll dropped he's name (at least in my blog haha. :P) By the way, today me n Poh Choo had a small talk with our new staff Kim Jon. We interviewed him about Canada and ask about any opportunities for us to work or study there. I'm surprised that it's quite easy to study or work in Canada (in GIS field) according to Kim Jon. He said, there's a few way we can do - find a job, apply for immigr

I'm addicted to this blog lately.. i know i promissed myself to make this blog as normal as i can, but for the time being i am emotionally unstabled, so i'm trying to put in words what i have in my heart n my mind right now - heartbroken, confused, sorrow, unstable, weak, unsatisfied, unambitious, unsuccessful, i'm not doing what i wanna do, im not doing things that i like, i feel my life now is just for the sake of 'surviving'..... yeah i feel empty n lost, that's the right words. Maybe I am lonely... i always feel lonely since i was small - there's part of me that r not fulfilled, all my life, i learned to ignore what i really want as i wont be able to have things the way i want. I guess i'm already an expert in this. But seriously days after days, im getting bored n bored n i feel like i wanna blow away n ignore what i have to do & choose to do things i long to do. The problem is, i forget what i want....i forget how to do it....I forget myself...

It's the "bad" feeling again.... i shouldn't play the games in the first place cause i never knew that it's actually can becomes so real for me. Yesterday i feel hurt and frustrated for i couldn't get what i want due to typical reason as i always face. It's really fucked up and sucks. I'm pretty sure it's due to my words that he came to his senses which i'm sure that's the main reasons he think it wouldn't work. Well, i know it wont work too but somehow i do feel so frustrated, sad n painful... i dont know why. Reality check, it's always that way... and i really hate or maybe i'm scared of this "like" feeling which i have yet to feel since 2 years ago, cause i don't want to trust anybody yet due to the horrible heart broken i had before. Love, relationship and marriage is a scary thing for me now. The weird thing is, it's so damn easy for me to accept who he was, its so damn easy for me to like him cause he has

American Idol is coming to the end, anyone who can votes, please vote for David Cook!! he deserves to win!! Sexy voice, talented, original, hot hot n sooo cute hahha. Ditch David Archulatte!! he looks too poyo la n he can't sing - boring..

I was having a fantastic time at Perhentian Island last weekend! I longed for that kind of vacation and i’m glad i joned my collegues to the island. It’s a great experienced and ‘romance’... hehhehe. My skin are more dark now but i think its worth it, “huisiow”(Swedish word) la heheh. So, my journey begins on Saturday 10th of may. Since i’m the last minutes kind of girl, i start packing my things at 12 am and went to sleep at 2 am. 2 hours later, i woke up with a terrible pain in both of my legs due to the 10 hours non-stop walking at BB and Petaling street area the day before. Teik Mun and Poh Choo arrived at my house around 5.30 am and Poh Choo mom took us to Subang airport. Not many people in the airport, very silent environment. I had to walk n drag my right foot like a limb and retarded girl. I don’t give a damn cause what ever happens i must reach Perhentian Island! hehee.. We took the 'firefly' plane, small, with big propeller.. it's pretty scary to ride but, the int

Yoda & Tam Yesterday i’m not in time to send my lovey Yoda to clinic due to heavy jam, and I regretted cause it was too late to save her, she died today. Another kitten died - Yoda & Tam - and only Fluffy left now (3rd Generation). Yoda was the cutest, weird looking (she really looks like Master Yoda) and most beautiful kitten i ever had and i do feel terrible and fell sad to lose her.

Huaargghhh..i'm yawning n stretching every 2 mnts! trying very hard to be awake today. I'm still stuck at JUPEM, can't go home yet due to this heavy rain. I spend all day today chating and read about ArSDE & SQL Server. I couldn't understand a single damn thing about the lecture contents. "It is hard work, Ok! Ok!, I'll do my work, Give me some shoes!" (the GLA workers in command and conquer dialogues) hehehe... Last saturday i watched a movie called "A lot like love", played by Ashton Kutcher and the heroine is unidentified. It was a simple and interesting movie to me. I really love it! I'm totally fell in love with the "Martin-Ashton Kutcher" charactor. He was so playful, funny, crazy, unpredictable, unique and ambitious. I'm seriously crazy about this type of guy!! The guy who can make me laugh and happy and can surprise me all the time, a guy who can never makes me bore with all he's jokes, he's mumbling, he'

Whoa.. its so cold in here!! Its raining heavily today.. can't stand the cold.. makes me wanna pee pee all the time uhuks.. tired la.. all because of my lil 'pundi' i guess hahaha.. what other reasons i can think off besides having a tiny 'pundi'?? my kidney not functioning effectively? its lazy to process, thus its just throw away exactly the same amount of water i dranks?? haha what ever it is..im tired to go to toilet..n its so cold!!! By, the way... my attempts to go to river has been cancelled again due to this rainy weather. I just went to my hometown Lenggeng to see my granddad land over there which i never been too since i was 13 i guess. A lot of changes and development have been made. Impressive! Then, we went for window shopping as my mom are starting to buy some 'accesories' for Raya uhuks.. too early ma.. but its ok at least we can start buying things bit by bit... well i can't wait till the end of this month! hehehe... Do u know how disgust

Yippie training is over!!!! Wow, i never thought i do had a great time teaching my students about GIS hehe. Its a big challenge though, cause they asked a lot of detailed questions- its a big surprise i can answer them all hahhaa- thats the best part! Do u guys like my blog? the music? :P i think the music suits this skin and the mood for now. I'll change the music later depends on my mood of the week hehe. I don't know how long this blog can survive cause i'm such a lazy writer, always write crapts swing mood thingy, but i'll try my best to make this blog normal :P.... and well, kind of malu with my broken n not so superb english like some people i know :D.. nevermind la.. as long as u guys understand kan... :D This weekend i plan to go to river if i can.. i need the river stone to rub my crack ugly foot!! It's getting worst! uhuks.... its just a plan.. i have to survive with only rm170 until the end of month.. poor me... ok ciou! i wanna go home feed my cats and l

I'm trying my new blog skin!